This is hard

How do you people do this? How do you have enough time/energy to constantly blog? I work six days a week not in front of a computer. I totally suck at this. I'd rather be topless and covered in tinsel on Christmas Eve or curled up in the fetal position comatose from mashed potatoes or driving four dudes to New Jersey in a big black creeper van while they pass a joint on the way to mom's house or singing Bohemian Rhapsody during karaoke with the red-faced, shit-faced general manager of Barneys at Grand Central Station.

The holidays have been good to this Jew. Full stories to come. Oh god, and pictures too.

Here's a preview: