Yesterday was like a bad New York girl's day chick flick and then it turned into heavy metal Party Monster (Chloe Sevigny was even there.) This btw, was all a good thing.
Nikki and I met to get neighborhood coffee and somehow ended up at Sephora buying her lady face things. Despite my recent gender rant about my newfound ladyness, I'd never set foot in that place before. Make-up counters in general scare the crap out of me. Who wants to face a stranger skilled in the art of analyzing your facial flaws? I braved it on Nikki's behalf and slowly but surely was seduced into turning over my face to the skilled tiny pixie pretty gay man manning the Lorak aisle. After looking at myself in the harsh lights in a 5x magnifying mirror I was defeated and helpless. I bought a $25 concealer/highlighter/blender ball combo that I'm still not sure how to use.
Next stop was Bloomingdales, Nikki was on the hunt for blush and I decided I needed red lipstick. After trolling counter after counter I found it. How well I was adjusting...former makeup counter virgin on a mission for that perfect $25 tube of red. 999, Celebrity Red, Dior. It took me about 20 tests to find the perfect shade, my hand was looking like that of a cutter. Severely neglected by the gay behind the counter we waited pleadingly to find out if they had two tubes, one for each of us to look like perfect floozies for New Years. The crushing response, NO!
Back to Sephora, they didn't have that color at all. Uptown to the other Bloomingdales...SOLD OUT! Where else? Barneys - No Dior. Bergdorf - No Dior. Uptown Sephora - Didn't carry that shade. Bendel - Nope. Saks Fifth Avenue, our last hope...found the Dior counter. Begging breathless we ask, do you have 999 Celebrity Red in stock pointing at our lips still stained with the Bloomingdales tester. YES! We got the last two tubes in Manhattan. And what do two ladies do after scoring the last two tubes of the perfect red Dior lipstick? Why, they go to Red Lobster to celebrate of course!
Nearly comatose after far too many cheddar bay biscuits we did what any ladies would do post Red Lobster post lipstick frenzy...we went to a thrash show and ate some magic psychedlic chocolate truffles and went wild. It was a sea of head-banging, dirty dancing, fist pumps, and grapes of wrath in the basement of Lit. Somehow I made it home without a red pentagram tattooed on my palm even though I was begging for a homemade one. However when I did make it home with my McDonalds breakfast takeout at 7:30 am, the Dior lipstick was smeared above my top lip. Glorious mess.