Tuesday, March 31, 2009

This is a mourning song

I've been keeping my mouth shut for some time about my current television devotions and it's time for me to spill my guts. Dear Rock of Love producers...HOW COULD YOU?!?!?! In two weeks time you allowed the greatest show on earth become a boring clusterfuck of bitchy brunettes. Come on, everyone knows you show is fake, why did you have to let Ashley leave? Seriously! I know, I know, she's happily making a bundle off of public appearances and stripping gigs with Farrah (the other love of my televion life) and she's back where she belongs, in the arms of her Biohazard-looking baby daddy, James, but now what? Am I going to have to go to Vegas to see discount Juliette Lewis in her full Hello Kitty tattooed glory? She of memorable quotes such as "People who eat basil are lame."

VH1 you made me miss her so much I had to request her friendship on MySpace (who has a private profile when they have 13,000 friends?) And no, Daisy of Love won't fill the void.

I can only hope she has something in the works along with Shaun from Tool Academy.