Quandry of the century

Conversation with my roommate:

"I feel like I'll get a bigger laugh if I cut the plastic on this package of chicken onstage and then pour out the blood into the cauldron rather than just bringing the blood out in a vial, but then if I cut it onstage I'll be wasting the chicken and I have a moral problem with wasting food."

I advised her to bring the chicken in a cooler and do everything in her power to save it because the laugh was too important to sacrifice and this way if the chicken was ruined at least she'd know she'd tried.

Yes, I am that helpful. And yes, my roommate is an actress.

My biggest quandry today was whether or not to eat noodle soup or just stick with a banana. I opted to try the noodle soup. Ahh my life, where digestion is a crapshoot.

Edit: Trying the noodle soup was a big mistake. On the bright side I lost 5 pounds...eh...